Good afternoon, my fellow legitimate Americans. Your friendly neighborhood Spider Dan reporting from the scorched Texas Hill Country. We need rain and need it today. Maybe the buffoons in Hopey-Dopey's camp will conjure up a magical spell and we'll get the jet stream to allow Gulf moisture to hose down our well baked countryside. Other than that, being here is pure delight.
Let's begin with this earth shaking revelation: Bill Clinton did good. No, that's not a typo. The former president -- disbarred, disgraced, and proven to be one of the worst until America got stoned and punked the world with Hopey-Dopey -- pulled off a magnificent political coup. Travelling to North Korea, Clinton secured the release of two American idiots trying to play big time investigative journalist. While all the details may have been hammered out before his arrival in Pyongyang, Clinton did what few could: used his influence to get those women out before they suffered a terrible fate at the hands of the North Koreans. Sure, two ditzy women flirted with disaster and got tangled up in a classic case of political theatre. Had anyone at Algore's "TV" network taken time to call me, I would have quickly informed those involved in the planning of this stunt to religiously avoid contact with North Korean authorities. A no-brainer, you say?
Apparently not.
Regardless of the failure to adequately brief those women and the feckless response from Algore himself, Clinton stepped up and took the time to fly to North Korea, leaving only with those two ladies in tow. I'll leave it up to each of you to decide how the duration of the flight back to Calfornia might have been spent, but even if those ladies were bathed in Clinton's joy juice somewhere over the Pacific, they're home and safe. Thank you, Mr. Clinton. Now, disappear until some other tinpot dictator needs your reinforcement.
I'm not one for "I told you so". But, this is too much to bear. For everyone of you that voted for this imbecile impersonating the President of the United States, a question: how do your personal shortcomings rectify your decision to support this quack, knowing what you know today?
Seems the lunatics comprising the Democratic Party (and the few million independent practical jokesters pulling the lever for this idiot) had no idea how much damage they might do to the nation. There may have been some speculation about short term damage to the party, but it seems none of them realized this frat prank would contribute to the demise of the United States of America to the degree it has and will. The 2010 election looms as a seminal moment for the future of our great land -- failure to wipe the Democrats out of the picture hastens our national demise. Before you get twisted up in knots declaring that comment to be "over the top" or "partisan hysterics", review the legislative agenda and accomplishments. I will not chronicle them here -- doing so makes you lazy. Investigate the monumental failures this clown and his crew have become, then recognize how difficult and expensive it's going to be repealing or reversing this madness.
Hopey-Dopey must be completely marginalized and rendered to lame duck status. There can be no compromise, no deals, nothing that leaves this rank amateur a shred of political credibility. Nevada can take a huge step by tossing Harry Reid out with the rest of the garbage. Nevada, we're watching. Think the economy is tough on your once mighty tourism industry?
Re-elect that blithering idiot and Hell hath no fury. I have very dear friends doing the Lord's work in that beleaguered state and expect they will mobilize as never before to usher Reid into the septic tank of history. I will go to Reno or Vegas or whatever God-forsaken former nuclear test site to campaign against Reid -- knowing his ouster will inspire and motivate legitimate Americans to act accordingly in their own corners of this great land. I will not provide a penny or one ounce of breath trying to convince the galactic idiots in California to get rid of Pelosi, Boxer, or Feinstein. They deserve each other and the consequences they bring every Californian. It's a sad day when so many good folks suffer just to prop up liberal divas, but apparently, liberal divas walk in friendly company in California. We can only pray legitimate Americans rise up in the Golden State and reclaim that valuable land for the good of all Americans.
I am not holding my breath on that one.
Let's begin with this earth shaking revelation: Bill Clinton did good. No, that's not a typo. The former president -- disbarred, disgraced, and proven to be one of the worst until America got stoned and punked the world with Hopey-Dopey -- pulled off a magnificent political coup. Travelling to North Korea, Clinton secured the release of two American idiots trying to play big time investigative journalist. While all the details may have been hammered out before his arrival in Pyongyang, Clinton did what few could: used his influence to get those women out before they suffered a terrible fate at the hands of the North Koreans. Sure, two ditzy women flirted with disaster and got tangled up in a classic case of political theatre. Had anyone at Algore's "TV" network taken time to call me, I would have quickly informed those involved in the planning of this stunt to religiously avoid contact with North Korean authorities. A no-brainer, you say?
Apparently not.
Regardless of the failure to adequately brief those women and the feckless response from Algore himself, Clinton stepped up and took the time to fly to North Korea, leaving only with those two ladies in tow. I'll leave it up to each of you to decide how the duration of the flight back to Calfornia might have been spent, but even if those ladies were bathed in Clinton's joy juice somewhere over the Pacific, they're home and safe. Thank you, Mr. Clinton. Now, disappear until some other tinpot dictator needs your reinforcement.
I'm not one for "I told you so". But, this is too much to bear. For everyone of you that voted for this imbecile impersonating the President of the United States, a question: how do your personal shortcomings rectify your decision to support this quack, knowing what you know today?
Seems the lunatics comprising the Democratic Party (and the few million independent practical jokesters pulling the lever for this idiot) had no idea how much damage they might do to the nation. There may have been some speculation about short term damage to the party, but it seems none of them realized this frat prank would contribute to the demise of the United States of America to the degree it has and will. The 2010 election looms as a seminal moment for the future of our great land -- failure to wipe the Democrats out of the picture hastens our national demise. Before you get twisted up in knots declaring that comment to be "over the top" or "partisan hysterics", review the legislative agenda and accomplishments. I will not chronicle them here -- doing so makes you lazy. Investigate the monumental failures this clown and his crew have become, then recognize how difficult and expensive it's going to be repealing or reversing this madness.
Hopey-Dopey must be completely marginalized and rendered to lame duck status. There can be no compromise, no deals, nothing that leaves this rank amateur a shred of political credibility. Nevada can take a huge step by tossing Harry Reid out with the rest of the garbage. Nevada, we're watching. Think the economy is tough on your once mighty tourism industry?
Re-elect that blithering idiot and Hell hath no fury. I have very dear friends doing the Lord's work in that beleaguered state and expect they will mobilize as never before to usher Reid into the septic tank of history. I will go to Reno or Vegas or whatever God-forsaken former nuclear test site to campaign against Reid -- knowing his ouster will inspire and motivate legitimate Americans to act accordingly in their own corners of this great land. I will not provide a penny or one ounce of breath trying to convince the galactic idiots in California to get rid of Pelosi, Boxer, or Feinstein. They deserve each other and the consequences they bring every Californian. It's a sad day when so many good folks suffer just to prop up liberal divas, but apparently, liberal divas walk in friendly company in California. We can only pray legitimate Americans rise up in the Golden State and reclaim that valuable land for the good of all Americans.
I am not holding my breath on that one.
posted by Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider Dan | 4:32 PM
1 Comments:
Heh heh, you used "bill Clinton" and "seminal" in the same article. Heh heh.
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